Public Confession

Let´s say my public confession is not exact, as it is. Let´s say I´m wrong, far from the accuracy of the view of my faulty feelings so, when Jesus comes, my nudity will be exposed to my shame in public.

Let me say there are things I never confessed, such as that lust I never pleased to full satisfaction and those things I did or said that never meant.

I stole, I lied, I killed.

I did things the other way around.

I lied, I cheated. 

That´s why I know these hurt.

I do not write for you. I do write for my sake.

These words will not lessen my guilt. These will not reduce the condemn I deserve. 

I cannot hide my faults and these help me nothing to find alibis or a remedy.

I´m a sinner! And I am not proud of this. I did wrong. And there is no chance to change the past (but the present) to make things anew, as an amendment.

Resentments? There are! I made things wrong and hurt.

I did more things I should. I hurt instead of loving. I killed instead of bringing life; and there is no chance to mend or apologize. 

I abused the innocent. I lied to get physical release and cheated up to the moment I knew that hurts.

I wish I had known all these things I now know.

Will I change the past?

Will I be back to ask them to forgive?

I wish I knew what I could, but there's no time to cry over leftover. 

I'm leaving life and I don't know why I came here...

A. Toro           May, 2013